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Celia – The Merv Griffin Show

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celia-the-merv-griffin-show-seinfeld

Played by: Julia Pennington

Appears in The Merv Griffin Show

She won’t let Jerry play with her antique toy collection so Jerry gets her drunk so he can play

Celia Quotes:

Jerry: And it was his idea to put a sprig of parsley on the plate.
Celia: You’re making this up. There was never a Joseph Garnish.
Jerry: Wow!
Celia: Oh yeah the toys.
Jerry: Where did you get all these?
Celia: My dad was a collector. I inherited them after he died from a long and painful bout …
Jerry: Super bowl! Hey, an original G. I. Joe. With a full frogman suit.
Celia: Jerry, what are you doing?
Jerry: I’m putting this on him and we’re going to the sink.
Celia: No Jerry. They’re priceless. They’ve never been played with.
Jerry: I just want to touch them a little.
Celia: I said no. Now come here.


Celia: Jerry! Those hands! They never stop!
Jerry: I’m sorry. You got any booze? Let’s say you and I get ripped!
Celia: No thanks. I have a headache. Can you just get me an aspirin?
Jerry: All right


George: More wine and turkey?
Jerry: So when I saw George on the street with an 18 pound turkey and a giant box of wine, I thought: … What a coincidence. We’re just about to eat.
Celia: What is that stuff in turkey that makes you sleepy?
Jerry and George: Triptaphen.
Jerry: … I think. Have some more wine.
Celia: What video did you get?
Jerry: Oh, George brought home movies of his boyhood trip to Michigan.
George: Four hours.
Jerry: More heavy gravy?


Kramer: Well, Jerry, we have a little surprise for you! Come on out, Celia!
Celia: What kind of a sick twisted creep are you?
Newman and Kramer: Woah.
Jerry: What is this? What is she doing here?
Kramer: It’s the new format. Scandals and Animals. Go with it.
Celia: If you think you can drug me and play with my toys, you got another thing coming, buddy!
Newman: Go girl!
Jerry: Well, what kind of woman drinks a whole box of wine?


Celia: I’m glad you called, Elaine. I really needed to talk to someone.
Elaine: Oh well, hey, I dated Jerry too. I know what a monster he can be. More wine and turkey?
Celia: Who’s he?
Elaine: Oh, he’s nobody. Hey, listen, … let me top that off for y’a.


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