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Donna Chang – The Chinese Woman

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Played by: Angela Dohrmann

Appears in The Chinese Woman

Jerry strikes up a conversation with Donna Chang on George’s phone line after the wires get crossed and asks her out on a date, thinking she’s Chinese. When Jerry finally meets Donna, he realizes she is not Chinese but shortened her last name from Changstein. Jerry gets annoyed and begins to think that Donna likes it when people mistake her for a Chinese woman.

Donna Chang Quotes:

Donna: Jerry.
Jerry: ‘scuse me?
Donna: Hi. Sorry I’m late.
Jerry: Who’re you?
Donna: I’m Donna Chang..
Jerry: What do you mean?
Donna: I mean: I’m Donna Chang.
Jerry: You’re Donna Chang?
Donna: Did you think I was Chinese?..
Jerry: Oh. No. Oh, you mean because of the “Chang”?
Donna: Actually, the family name wasn’t originally Chang.
Jerry: I didn’t think so.
Donna: It used to be “Changstein.”

Jerry: So did they, uh, uncross the lines, yet?
Donna: No. They can’t find the problem. It’s really getting ridicurous.
Jerry: Did you say, “ridicurous”?
Donna: Ridiculous.
Jerry: thought you said.. “ridicurous.”
[GEORGE comes in.] Jerry: Oh, what are you doing here?
George: Oh, I wanted to, talk to you–I’m sorry, I–didn’t know you had company. Hi, uh, I’m George.
Donna: Oh! Hi! I’m Donna Chang. I just spoke to your mother before.
George: You spoke to my mother?
Donna: She was trying to call you, but–
Jerry: The rines were crossed?
George: Did you say, “The rines were crossed?”
Jerry: Did I?
Donna: George, she’s so sweet. We talked for an hour! Anyway, I’m really sorry.
George: Sorry? Why sorry? What do you have to be sorry for?
Donna: Well, she told me she and your father are getting divorced.

Donna: Hi.
Jerry: Oh, Miss Changstein! This is Elaine..
Donna: Helllo..
Elaine: Hi! Good to meet you.
Donna: Guess what? Mrs. Costanza called me, they’re not getting divorced.
Jerry: Why? What happened?
Donna: Well, she was trying to call George last night, she got me, we spoke for an hour, she changed her mind!!!
Jerry: Wow! That’s amazing!
Donna: Anyway, she wants to meet me! She invited me over for dinner! She said you should come too.
Jerry: Tonight?
Donna: Yeah–I just remembered: I’m gonna have to cancel my acupuncture class.

Jerry: So I’m curious. What’d you tell Mrs. Costanza that changed her mind?
Donna: I mentioned a few bits of wisdom from Confucius.
Jerry: Confucius, huh?
Donna: Yeah.
Jerry: You know, you’re not Chinese…

Estelle: You’re not Chinese!?!?
Donna: No.
Estelle: I thought you were Chinese!!
Donna: I’m from Long Island.
Estelle: Long Island?!?! I thought I was gettin’ advice from a Chinese woman!!
Donna: I’m sorry..?
Estelle: Well! Then, that changes everything!
George: What?!
Estelle: She’s not Chinese; I was duped!!
George: So what?! She gave you advice; what’s the difference if she’s not Chinese?!?!
Estelle: I’m not taking advice from some girl from Long Island!!

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