Played by: Linda Kash
Appears in: The Lip Reader
Gwen breaks up with George, using his favorite line, “it’s not you; it’s me”. But George believes that Gwen is breaking up with him because he appeared on TV sloppily eating an ice cream sunday at the US Open. George gets the idea to take Jerry’s deaf girlfriend, Laura, to a party so she can read Gwen’s lips to see what she is saying about him. They arrive at the party and meet Laura who watches Gwen’s conversation and signs to Kramer who voices it out loud. When Kramer mistakenly says that Todd asks Gwen to ‘sleep’ with him, George rushes up to them and tells them that he heard everything. When Gwen corrects him, he starts shouting at Laura and Kramer until he accidentally trips over a table and crashes the party.
Gwen: I’m sorry George.
George: I don’t understand things were going so great. What happened? Something must have happened.
Gwen: It’s not you, it’s me.
George: You’re giving me the “it’s not you, it’s me” routine? I invented “it’s not you, it’s me”. Nobody tells me it’s them not me, if it’s anybody it’s me.
Gwen: All right, George, it’s you.
George: You’re damn right it’s me.
Gwen: I was just trying to…
George: I know what you were trying to do. Nobody does it better than me.
Gwen: I’m sure you do it very well.
George: Yes well unfortunately you’ll never get the chance to find out.
George: So you’re getting rid of me and now the two of you are going to sleep together?
Gwen: What? You’re crazy.
Kramer: “What? You’re crazy.”
George: I heard your whole conversation.
George: I can read lips. You said let’s sleep together.
Gwen: No I didn’t. I said “sweep”. Let’s sweep together, you know with a broom. Cleaning up.
Kramer: “… with a broom, cleaning up.”
Gwen: Yes sweep.