Played by: Michelle Forbes
Appears in: The Big Salad
Elaine’s asks George to purchase a “big salad” for her while he and his girlfriend Julie go to Monk’s. When they return to Jerry’s, Julie takes credit for the purchase when she hands the big salad to Elaine the salad. George is upset that Elaine thanked Julie for the salad so he mentions to Elaine that he was the one that actually made the purchase. In George’s view, is was not that Elaine thanked the wrong person, but that Julie accepted the thanks, “what I would like to know is, how does a person who has nothing to do with the Big Salad claim responsibility for that salad and accept the thank-you under false pretenses?”
Julie: I like Anna’s column and Sapphire. Don’t you like Sapphire?
George: Oh, Sapphire. Uh ha
Julie: Although at times can be rather pedantic.
George: He can be pedantic. He can be pedantic.
Julie: And Bob Herbert’s great. He’s the Daily News.
George: Yes. Yes. You know what’s interesting. The quarterback for the Atlanta Falcons is Bobby Hebert. No “r” which I find fascinating. You know it’s Herbert h-e-r-b-e-r-t, Hebert h-e-b-e-r-t. “Hebert” it’s a fun name to pronounce. Try and say it Hebert. Take a shot. All right. [check arrives] All right. I got it.
Julie: No, no. I’d like to take you out.
George: No, Julie, Julie, don’t insult me. You know, what difference does it make who pays for lunch. It’s totally meaningless.
Julie: Okay, thanks, George.
Waitress: Here’s your big salad to go.
Julie: Oh, thank you.
Julie: Sorry we’re late.
Elaine: No problem.
Julie: Here’s your big salad.
Elaine: Thank you, Julie.
Julie: Oh, you’re very welcome. So, I guess I better get going. Gotta meet mother a t the Guggenheim. Sure you don’t want to go?
George: No, you go Guggenheim. I’m not much of a Guggenheimer.
Julie: Ha. So, George, I was talking to Elaine before.
George: A ha! We’re just friends.
Julie: Yes, well anyway, she said something that was kind of intriguing.
George: Oh, share.
Julie: Well, when I came over to the table she mentioned something about how she better hurry up and leave or you’d make her buy lunch to make up for the one you bought yesterday.
George: Ha, ha ha uh, I’m not following that.
Julie: Well, my question is, How could Elaine be under the impression that you bought the big salad, when I was the one who handed it to her?
George: Well, she probably just assumed.
Julie: Um, did she?
George: . . .uh, . . . wait a second. Are you suggesting that I went out of my way to tell Elaine that even though you handed her the big salad, that it came from me?
Julie: That’s what I’m suggesting.
George: . . . WELL IT WAS A BIG SALAD. AND WHAT I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW IS, HOW DOES A PERSON WHO HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE BIG SALAD CLAIM RESPONSIBILITY FOR THAT SALAD AND ACCEPT THE THANK YOU UNDER FALSE PRETENSES – AH – AH?
Julie: George, all I did was hand someone a bag.