Played by: Tracy Kolis
Appears in The Ex-Girlfriend
When Marlene and George break up, Jerry gets involved romantically with her while retrieving George’s books from her apartment. Jerry learns that although Marlene is really sexy she has a tendency to act very annoying, especially over the phone. Later, Marlene says that she can’t date Jerry anymore because she saw his act and loses respect for his profession. To which Jerry replies “but you’re a cashier!”
Marlene: ..So, it must’ve been ninety-five degrees that night, and everyone’s just standing around the pool with little drinks in their hands. I was wearing my old jeans and T-shirt. And I don’t know, I was just in one of those moods – so I said to myself, “Marlene, just do it,” and I jumped in. And as I’m getting out, I feel all these eyes on me, and I look up and everyone is just staring at me.
Jerry: So what’d you do?
Marlene: Well, nothing. It’s not skin off my hide if people like to look. I just didn’t see what the big attraction was.
Jerry: Well, I have a general idea what it was. I could take a guess.
Marlene: Hey, you know, Jerry, just because George and I don’t see each other anymore, it doesn’t mean we shouldn’t stay friends.
Marlene: Good enough. I’m really glad we got that settled.
Marlene: Are you feeling weird?
Jerry: No, I’m fine.
Marlene: Nothing really happened.
Jerry: Yeah, I know.
Marlene: We just kissed a little. People kiss.
Marlene: Well.. night.
Marlene: (Leaving a message) Jerry, have you ever taken a bath in the dark? If I’m not talking into the soap right now, call me back.
Marlene: ..I’m sorry, Jerry. I just don’t think this is going to work.
Jerry: Really? I thought..
Marlene: I know, I’m sorry.
Jerry: I guess I just didn’t expect it from the way you’ve been acting.
Marlene: You sure you want to talk about this? ‘Cause I sure don’t.
Jerry: Of course I want to talk about it.
Marlene: Well, okay. I guess things changed for me on Tuesday night.
Jerry: Tuesday night? What happened Tuesday night?
Marlene: ..I saw your act.
Jerry: My act? What does that have to do with anything?
Marlene: Well, to be honest, it just didn’t make it for me. It’s just so much fluff.
Jerry: I can’t believe this. So what are you saying? You didn’t like my act, so that’s it?
Marlene: I can’t be with someone if I don’t respect what they do.
Jerry: You’re a cashier!
Marlene: Look, Jerry, it’s just not my kind of humor.
Jerry: You can’t go by the audience that night. It was late. They were terrible.
Marlene: I heard the material.
Jerry: I have other stuff. You should come see me on the weekend.