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Mr. Kruger – Not if You Could See Our Books

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Mr. Kreuger is George’s boss and the President of Kruger Industrial Smoothing. He is known for not caring much about his job, and botching the big Statue of Liberty job because they couldn’t get the green stuff off.

Kruger is played by Daniel von Bargen, and appears in four episodes in Season 9.

Sadly, Daniel von Bargen passed away on March 1, 2015 at the age of 64. 

Mr. Kruger Appears in:

The Slicer

It is revealed that one time while at the beach, Mr. Kruger and his sons took all George’s stuff and threw it into the ocean. George realizes that it was Mr. Kruger when he sees a picture of Kruger’s family at the beach with him in the background.

Afraid that Kruger would remember him, George has the picture airbrushed to remove himself, but the picture is ruined. To get another picture of Mr. Kruger without a shirt on, Kramer poses as a dermatologist, Dr. Van Nostrand.


The Strike

Kruger gives George $20,000 for a charity that he made called “The Human Fund, money for people”. When Kruger found out it wasn’t real, George confesses that he made up the charity to escape religious persecution for not celebrating Christmas, but celebrating Festivus.

In order to prove to Kruger that it existed, George invites him to Festivus Dinner at the Costanza’s house.


The Burning

In an attempt to improve his showmanship, George begins to leave meetings “on a high note” when he gets a laugh. This goes well for him at work until Kruger kicks everyone off of the project except George because they were boring in comparison, leaving George to d all of the work.

The Maid

Mr. Kruger nicknames George “Koko” after Koko the monkey, which infuriates George, who wanted to be called “T-Bone”. In order to force Kruger to stop using the nickname, George gets a cleaning woman name Koko hired at the company. Instead, Kruger starts calling George “Gammy”.

Mr. Kruger Quotes:

Kruger: Your background is impressive George, but ugh, how does it apply to what we do here at Kruger Industrial Smoothing?
George: Well at the Yankees, it was all about smoothing things over. You know? Chiseling away. Grinding down. In fact, we used to call it the grind
Kruger: It says here that you worked at Play Now for four days?
George: That should be a fourteen
Kruger: Well George, I gotta be honest, I could go either way on you…but what the hell, we need someone.
George: You won’t regret this Sir!
Kruger: I don’t care.

Kruger: Oh damn, I’ve locked myself out of my office again…Alright, I’m going home.

Kruger: According to our latest quarterly thing, Kruger Industrial Smoothing is heading into the red…or the black…or, whatever the bad one is. Any thoughts?
George: Well, I know when I’m a little strapped, I sometimes drop off my rent check having “forgotten” to sign it. That could buy us some time.
Kruger: Works for me. Good thinking George.

Kruger: George, come in. I’m just going over our annual report…boy did we take it on the chin last year.

Kruger: Hey, George. Merry Christmas. Here you go.
George: Thank you, sir. Here’s your gift.
Kruger: A donation has been made in your name to the Human Fund”?… Whatever.
George: Exactly.

Kruger: Watkins, you’re havin’ a T-bone?
Watkins: I love ’em.
Kruger: Well, then we should call you T-bone.
George: Uh, no. No, we shouldn’t.
Kruger: T-bone!

Kruger: …And it gets worse. The team working on the statue in Lafayette Square kind of over-smoothed it. They ground the head down to about the size of a softball, and that spells trouble.

Kruger: George, we have a problem. There’s a memo, here, from accounting telling me there’s no such thing as the Human Fund.
George: Well, there could be.
Kruger: But there isn’t.

George: Kramer! You can’t go! Who’s gonna do the feats of strength?
Kruger: How about George?
Frank: Good thinking, Kruger. Until you pin me, George, Festivus is not over!

Kruger: Hey, look at George. He’s givin’ it to T-bone. He’s jumpin’ up and down like some kind of monkey. Hey, what was the name of that monkey that could read sign language?
Watkins: All right, you can have T-bone. Stop crying.
George (sniffling): I’m not crying. And I shouldn’t have said that about your wife. Please accept my apologies.
Watkins and George enter the conference room.
George: Ok, everybody, uh…I have an announcement to make. From now on, I will be known as-
Kruger: Koko the monkey.

George: Don’t you even care? This is your company. It’s your name on the outside of the building. Speaking of which, the R fell off and all it says now is K-UGER.
Kruger: K-UGER. That sounds like one of those old time car horns, huh? K-UGER! K-UGER!
George: You are too much, Mr. Kruger. Too much!
Kruger: Thank you George, you’ve been great. That’s it for me!
George: What? No, no, you’re not going out on a high note with me, Mr. Kruger.
Kruger: It’s K-UGER!

Kramer: Male mammal. Approximately 30 to 60 years of age. Weight…uh indeterminate. Ok, Mr. Kruger, we are gonna take a photo now for the records. So if you’ll stand up please and give me a big smile, oh no no no, not that big. Yeah, that’s nice, yes okay. Yes, let’s have a looksee…ok, so eh, fiber from shirt on the left shoulder. I’m gonna have to keep my on that.
Kruger: How long have you been doing this Dr. Van Nostrand?
Kramer: Uuh, long long time. Yes, I’ve seen moles so big they have their own moles. Freckles that cover two men.

George: Hey. Where is everyone?
Mr. Kruger: They’re all off the project. They were boring. George, you are my main man.
George: I am?
Mr. Kruger: I don’t know what it is, I can’t put my finger on it, but lately you have just seemed ‘on’. And you always leave me wanting more.
George: This is a huge project involving lots of numbers and papers and folders.
Mr. Kruger: Ah, I’m not too worried about it. Let’s get started.