Played by: Lisa Malkiewicz
Appears in The Cheever Letters
Jerry calls Elaine at work, but complains about her chatty secretary Sandra which causes her to quit. So Elaine asks Jerry to apologize to Sandra and prevent her from quitting, and Jerry asks her out on a date. They end up going back to his apartment but Sandra leaves after they start talking dirty and Jerry crosses the line.
Elaine: Could you do me a favor? Um, when my friends call, could you not talk to them for too long?
Sandra: Why? Did Jerry say something?
Elaine: No, no.
Sandra: He must have said something.
Elaine: Oh, no, he didn’t say anything.
Sandra: (Near tears) I can’t work for you! I can’t. I’m leaving.
Elaine: No, Sandra. I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I really am! Listen, listen, Jerry’s under a lot of pressure right now. It’s very hard being a stand-up comedian! Sometimes they don’t laugh!
Sandra: (Offended) I can’t believe you said that!
Sandra: How could you say something like that to me?!
Jerry: What? What?! You were the one who was talking dirty. I was just trying to keep up!
Sandra: That was a weird thing to say.
Jerry: Why? It didn’t mean anything. I was just trying to join in so you wouldn’t feel embarrassed.
Sandra: Ohh, I think you’re really sick.
Jerry: I’m not sick. You – you said much sicker things than me.
Sandra: I’m leaving.
Jerry: I really think you’re making too much of this.
Sandra: Excuse me.
Jerry: Let me walk you to a cab.
Sandra: That’s ok.
Jerry: I mean, the main thing is that this is just between us, and that’ll be the end of it.
Sandra: Oh, really?
Jerry: I mean, people – they’re not interested in things like this. They don’t want to hear about it. They really don’t.