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25 Seinfeld Microaggressions That Will Invade Your Safe Space

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Much has been made about the news that Jerry Seinfeld will not play college campuses anymore due to the sensitivity of students and the pressure to be politically correct. Students are demanding the right for safe spaces where they are free from criticism, dissenting opinion, and microaggressions… there is also this garbage.

A microaggression refers to unintended discrimination that communicates hostile or negative messages, targeting people based on their marginalized group membership. I always thought that was called being a dick, but this is the new millennium people.

It’s a good thing that Seinfeld originally aired in the 1990’s because they pushed the limits of political correctness many times in the name of situational comedy.

Here are 25 Seinfeld microaggressions that will invade your safe space.

  1. Kramer is mistaken for a mentally challenged person after getting Novocaine at the dentist and wearing vertical leap training shoes. He ends up meeting Arnold Deensfrei of the AMCA (Able Mentally Challenged Adults) and gets invited to a benefit and sits at the head table with Mr. Mel Torm, aka the Velvet Fog. Kramer does an over the top impression of a mentally challenged man and ends the episode by singing into a microphone. Its not a great look. – the Jimmy
  2. Jerry gets a date with a woman named Donna Changstein who likes to have people to mistake her for a Chinese woman. She changes her name to Donna Chang, suggests Chinese food, practices acupuncture, quotes Confucius,  and mispronounces words like ridiculous (ridic-u-rous). Jerry gets annoyed with the act and it eventually causes George’s parents to get a divorce after she gave advice to George’s mother under false pretenses. She thought she was getting advice from a Chinese woman, not some girl from Long Island. – the Chinese Woman
  3. When street traffic is blocked due to the Puerto Rican Day Parade, Elaine tries to find a way around the traffic by crawling underneath the bleachers. Turns out, there are many more people looking for a way around, so Elaine leads them under the bleachers into a dead end. This episode is rarely aired on reruns over the controversial joke about the plight of immigrants seeking a better life in America. – The Puerto Rican Day Parade
  4. After getting into an argument, Jerry buys Elaine a cigar store Indian as a gift to “bury the hatchet.” He brings it to her house while she has friends over playing poker and while giving her the gift, he makes remarks about Native Americans to Elaine’s friend Winona who is a Native American. Jerry apologizes and they eventually go out on a date together, but Jerry continues to make racist remarks, causing Winona to break it off. – the Cigar Store Indian
  5. Jerry decides to give his business to a local Pakistani restaurant in the neighborhood run by Babu Bhat. Not only is Babu a walking stereotype, but Jerry also criticizes the restaurant’s cuisine, recommending that he serve authentic Pakistani food, which apparently is gross because after the menu change Babu is run out of business – the Cafe
  6. George’s boss Mr. Morgan thinks that he is racist after George says he looks like Sugar Ray Leonard. In order to convince Mr. Morgan otherwise, George tries to come up with a black friend that he can show off to prove he’s not a racist. He recruits Karl the exterminator that appeared in a previous episode, the Doodle, and takes him to lunch to meet Mr. Morgan. His cover story is that Karl used to be a linebacker in High School and they nicknamed him the Exterminator. – the Diplomat’s Club
  7. A man recognizes Jerry at the coffee shop and asks him to pay a visit to his son who has an autoimmune deficiency and lives in a bubble. For the rest of the episode, the group refers to him as the bubble boy. While playing a game of trivial pursuit, George gets into an argument with the bubble boy and during the scuffle, pops his bubble. – the Bubble Boy
  8. While in the coffee shop George and Jerry pretend to be a gay couple when someone is eavesdropping on their conversation. Turns out, the woman who was eavesdropping was a reporter from NYU who was going to interview Jerry. When she eventually does the interview, she mistakes Jerry and George for a gay couple. Not that there is anything wrong with that. – the Outing
  9. When a busboy accidentally causes a napkin to catch fire at one of his tables, George makes a comment to the manager that ends up getting the busboy fired. When George goes to the busboy’s apartment to apologize, he brings the K-man for support. But Kramer starts speaking nonsensical Spanish, knocks over a lamp, and lets the cat get out when he forgets to close the door behind him. In a search for the cat, the busboy finds a new job and everything works out until he gets into a fight with Elaine’s boyfriend in the hallway of Jerry’s building and they both get severely injured. – the Busboy
  10. The group discovers a great little soup stand in Jerry’s neighborhood. The only problem is that it is run by a soup “Nazi” who is very particular about what you can say and how you should order. Kramer is the only person that really understands that the Soup Nazi suffers for his soup and befriends him. George and Elaine are not so lucky and get kicked out of the soup stand, “No soup for you!” However, Elaine gets the last laugh when she finds the Soup Nazi’s soup recipes in an old armor and ends his stranglehold. – the Soup Nazi
  11. While at the U.S. Open Jerry introduces himself to the beautiful lineswoman named Laura who ends up being deaf. When George learns that Laura can read lips, he convinces her to spy on his ex-girlfriend at a party. When reading her lips, Laura confuses “let’s sweep together” for “let’s sleep together” George gets upset and blows their cover. – the Lip Reader
  12. The group goes to a mall in New Jersey to buy a big screen TV for the Drake’s wedding gift and they park in a handicap spot. While in the store, a disabled woman Lola gets injured in a wheelchair accident after she was forced to park far away because of their illegal parking. While visiting the injured handicapped woman at the hospital, Kramer starts to have feelings for her and wants to replace her wheelchair. When George and Kramer go for a cheaper model, Lola is later seen rolling down a hill in the used wheelchair, which she cannot stop due to faulty brakes – the Handicap Spot
  13. While at the hospital visiting their friends that just had a baby, Kramer thinks that he sees a pigman (half-pig and half-man), and he develops a conspiracy theory “The government’s been experimenting with pig-men since the ’50s!” Kramer tries to help the pigman escape, but it turns out that the “pigman” was just a fat little mental patient. – the Bris
  14. After George’s mother catches him using his body like an amusement park, the group decides to have a contest to see who can hold out from “doing that” the longest. One by one, everybody caves when they are tempted by a naked woman across the street, JFK Jr., and a virgin. George ends up becoming the master of his domain, but it is later revealed in the Finale that he cheated. – the Contest
  15. While shopping at Susan’s uncle’s store Ross’s, George notices that the security guard does not have a chair to sit in, so George becomes obsessed with getting him a chair. When George finally does get him a chair, the store is robbed and the security guard is found asleep in the chair. – the Maestro
  16. Jerry gets his haircut from two over-the-top Italian guys, Enzo and Geno. Not only do they portray Italian stereotypes and speak in horrible Italian accents, but they also are obsessed with Edward Scissorhands, like every barber has to love that movie. Not cool! – the Barber
  17. George gets a new job at Play Now Sports and they think he is handicapped because he is walking with a cane. George takes advantage of the situation when they offer him his own private handicap bathroom. George keeps up the lie until he gets into an argument with an old man after they bump scooters. The old man chases George’s in his cart, so George picks up his cart and starts running, but he is seen by his boss who is passing by on the street. – the Butter Shave
  18. Jerry dates a Romanian gymnast named Katya who won a silver medal at the 1984 Olympics. Jerry begins to get excited about the idea of having sex with a gymnast after Kramer shows him a tape of her Olympic performance. Turns out that in Romania, a comedian is a man with great sexual libido, and Katya breaks up with Jerry when she learns that he was not all that she expected in bed. – the Gymnast
  19. Kramer and Newman want to start a rickshaw business in New York City so they recruit a bunch of homeless men to audition for a chance to pull the rickshaw. The plan eventually backfires when a bum runs off with the rickshaw. – the Bookstore
  20. After Elaine gets George a new job at Pendant Publishing, he has sex with the cleaning woman from his office. The cleaning woman is from Columbia and recalls a story from her past when a man showed her cashmere for the first time. George ends up getting fired when the cleaning lady reports the incident. – the Red Dot
  21. While out in LA, Kramer is accused of being “the Smog Strangler”, a serial killer terrorizing the area. While in custody a detective asks Kramer about being molested as a child. “Maybe the pervert in the park had a presence in his pants, huh?” After it is revealed that the murderer struck again while Kramer is in custody, he is released, but asks the detective on the way out “how’d you know about the guy in the park?” – the Trip
  22. Jerry and George decide to get massages because they have a friend who can write a doctors note for their insurance coverage. When George gets a male masseuse, he is worried about being gay because he thinks that the male masseuse “made it move.” The rest of the episode, George is worried that people are beginning to think that he’s gay. – the Note
  23. Elaine becomes alarmed when she learns that her birth control of choice is going off the market. In a mad dash, she runs around town trying to stock up on “Today Sponges” and cleans out the whole West Side. When George learns that Susan also uses the Today Sponge, he goes over to Elaine’s to borrow some but she doesn’t think its “sponge worthy”, cockblocking him from makeup sex. – the Sponge
  24. While having dinner at his Manya’s house, Jerry makes a remark about how he hates anyone that had a pony when they were growing up. Manya angrily responds that she had a pony growing up, Jerry remarks that he’s never seen an immigrant riding a pony. “Who would leave a country packed with ponies for a non-pony country?” – the Pony Remark
  25. Elaine poses as a beard for her gay friend Robert when he is asked to go out with his conservative boss and his wife. After a great “date” Elaine falls for Robert and decides that she is going to try and get him to change teams. After trying to convert Robert, Elaine realizes that she can never satisfy him like someone who has access to the equipment 24 hours a day. – the Beard